what's in a name?

"what's in a name? that which we call a rose, by any other name, would smell as sweet.." so shakespeare wrote in "romeo & juliet". hmm. there may be a grain of truth in this statement. but i can't say i fully agree with it..

for me, names are important. and by names, i mean not only our real names (the ones given to us by our parents at birth); but more importantly, our nicknames - the ones we choose for ourselves. what, indeed, is in a name?

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1. giving a name to something gives you authority over it. read the Bible. in genesis, when God made man, He allowed him to name the animals (gen 2:19).. giving man authority over the other creatures. i guess by the same token, this is why our parents are the ones who give us our names at birth.

conversely, we find it hard to control something we cannot attach a name to. that is why we hear phrases like "nameless terror" or "faceless enemy" or even that famous harry potter villain, "he-who-must-not-be-named". being able to name and identify one's fear is already halfway through getting over it.

2. a person's name describes him. you can tell a lot about a person based on his names. from one's real name, you can probably deduce something about his parents. is he a junior? the third? the fourth? hmm. maybe he comes from a proud family. is his name taken from the Bible? maybe his parents are God-fearing.

but there's more to discover from a person's nickname. what do his friends call him? is it a funny-sounding name? is there a story behind it? does he get irritated when friends call him such? what name does he want people to call him? just by answering these questions, one can find out a lot of things about a person.

3. a person's name links him to others. people do not have just *one* name. they are called various names.. depending on the people they are with.

i have a lot of names. my students call me either "ma'am roxy" or "ma'am v". my parents call me "selle," and so do some of my other relatives. my ninang and two cousins call me "ten". some of my close friends call me "selya" while most others call me "rox". still, some choirmates call me "rokel". i also have names reserved for special people.. (until recently, my special someone called me "honey" or "dear".)
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so what's in a name? nothing and everything, at the same time. it can be as trivial or as priceless as you want it to be. it can say as much or as little about you as you wish. but one thing i know: we choose our own names. just as we forge our own destiny. we choose what we want to make of our lives.. and we choose how we want others to remember us.

i lost my special name recently. but maybe, in time and with God's grace, i'll be able to make a new one for myself.. or find somebody who'll give me one instead. who knows.. i might just get my old name back.. along with the one who originally gave it to me..