blah

what a blah day. so far, that is. this is not my usual saturday morning.. but i' not complaining, really. i did not go to choir practice 'coz today's also the release of report cards at school. it's now 11.45am and already, i've done quite a lot. i still have other stuff to do (tutor my cousin in math.. then meet a gal pal later for lunch) but somehow i still feel "blah."

i was supposed to go on an adventure today. i was planning to drive to a faraway place by my lonesome.. seek out new thrills.. do something different.. prepare a surprise. unfortunately, i won't be able to do that. not today, at least. other commitments got in the way. what a bummer. what a letdown. BLAH.

ok, so things did not turn out as i hoped. i'm not happy about it. but i'm not *that* bummed either. disappointed, i guess.. but not pissed enough to scream and shout and kick in frustration. even my ranting does not have any bite. lacks venom. too tame. too lame. too.. BLAH.

i'm not used to this un-feeling. heck, even my past "numb episodes" were full of drama.. my thoughts and emotions swinging from cheesy romanticism to pathetic self-pity to dark despair to hatred to God knows what else. now, though.. there's nothing. nada. not even that melodramatic "emptiness" (that is actually an oxymoron 'coz it's not really empty) i've been writing about. hmm. like i said.. BLAH.

wonder when this BLAHness will end..

hahaha. i am so weird that sometimes even i get freaked out with myself.