amnesia

the human brain is such a complex and interesting thing. so powerful yet so delicate. it can do a myriad things.. come up with all sorts of ideas. it gives birth to inventions that change the world. yet in a mere split second, it can just as easily turn against itself. a single word.. a single unfortunate event.. is enough to influence somebody's mind.. is enough to change a person's whole self.. maybe forever.

it never ceases to amaze me how such a tiny organ can control my entire body. i suppose my brain doesn't weigh any more than a few grams.. but my whole essence.. my very self is contained therein. every word i've ever spoken.. every decision i've made.. every waking memory.. every dream.. all these are recorded in the nooks and crannies of my grey matter.

sometimes i wish i could erase some of the things in my head. i wish i could delete the errors in judgment. or at least modify some of my memories so they wouldn't hurt me so much.

hmm. selective amnesia, perhaps? i don't know. i really don't know. it's difficult to battle with your own thoughts. it's so hard to fight your own brain.. your own self. you end up on the losing end.. all the time.. :(