puzzles

a friend once told me that i think too much, too quickly. she said it's hard to keep up with my thoughts. she said i should give myself a break.. relax, take it easy and try hard not to think. i would have wanted to tell her that (1) perhaps she just didn't think enough; and (2) how could someone try hard *not* to think?! wouldn't that be some kind of oxymoron? but, being the "polite" friend that i am, i just nodded my head and pretended to agree with her hehe =p

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i don't know why, but i find great pleasure in thinking constantly and putting my "little grey cells" (as hercule poirot would often say) to work. i love puzzles - all kinds of them! from logic problems to crossword puzzles to anagrams to cryptograms, etc. i enjoy reading immensely. i read all sorts of books... but am particularly interested in detective/mystery/spy novels. i prefer those twisted, unpredictable, crazy plots and i make a game of predicting how the story would end.

i once took a series of psych tests (like the ones they give at the student services department) and the counselor told me that i was a logical thinker. sha also said that i was intelligent (hahahaha), a bit obsessed with order and neatness (umm, not exactly her words, i think), introspective (ain't it obvious?!) and an introvert (no comment). bottom line... the counselor said i was a more or less smart girl who likes to be left alone to think and put her life in order. or something like that hehe.

which brings me back to my fascination with puzzles. what is it about them that appeals to me? i'm not really sure, but right now, i see *my* life as one big puzzle. when i try to analyze what's been going on with me, i see a lot of chaos... and that really bugs me and brings me out of my comfort zone. i can't exactly say i'm *fascinated* with my life at the moment. however, i guess if i look at it with my "puzzle eyes", in time i'll see a way to put things back in order. maybe in the midst of all this chaos, there is an interesting pattern... an intricate and beautiful design just waiting to be discovered.

and maybe someday soon, i'll see that my life does have some order. i'm just probably in one of those crazy, twists and turns in my life's story Ü