thankful for the sorrow

january 20, 2006. one of the *very* memorable dates for me. not one i'd choose to remember.. except that i couldn't help but relive that day over and over in my mind.

but now, i can recall that day and not tear up. bit by bit, the pain abates. it's funny.. but these past days, i've been made to realize that i *am* healing. maybe i'm not yet back to normal.. but i know i'm on the road to getting there :)

today, as i was trying to find devotionals to include in our church's weekly newsletter, i thought of reading the Streams in the Desert entry for that date. and i was quite surprised to note that that day's message was *exactly* what i needed to hear then. if only i had read it back then. if only i had taken the time to really pray about it.. and to seek His Word.. His guidance. hmmm. i may have read His message a couple of weeks late.. but still, i'm grateful for it.

thank God.. i can smile again. but now, i thank Him too for the tears and the sorrow.

sharing with you the devotional that touched me deeply...

“Sorrow is better than laughter, because a sad face is good for the heart.” (Ecc 7:3)

Sorrow, under the power of divine grace, performs various ministries in our lives. Sorrow reveals unknown depths of the soul, and unknown capacities for suffering and service. Lighthearted, frivolous people are always shallow and are never aware of their own meagerness or lack of depth. Sorrow is God’s tool to plow the depths of the soul, that it may yield richer harvests. If humankind were still in a glorified state, having never fallen, then the strong floods of divine joy would be the force God would use to reveal our souls’ capacities. But in a fallen world, sorrow, yet with despair removed, is the power chosen to reveal us to ourselves. Accordingly, it is sorrow that causes us to take the time to think deeply and seriously.

Sorrow makes us move more slowly and considerately and examine our motives and attitudes. It opens within us the capacities of the heavenly life, and it makes us willing to set our capacities afloat on a limitless sea of service for God and for others.
God never uses anyone to a great degree until He breaks the person completely. Joseph experienced more sorrow than the other sons of Jacob, and it led him into a ministry of food for all the nations. For this reason, the Holy Spirit said of him, “Joseph is a fruitful vine.. near a spring, whose branches climb over a wall” (Gen 49:22). It takes sorrow to expand and deepen the soul.

Every person and every nation must endure lessons in God’s school of adversity. In the same way, “Blessed is the night, for it reveals the stars to us,” we can say, “Blessed is sorrow, for it reveals God’s comfort.” A flood once washed away a poor man’s home and mill, taking with it everything he owned in the world. He stood at the scene of his great loss, brokenhearted and discouraged. Yet after the waters had subsided, he saw something shining in the riverbanks that the flood had washed bare. “It looks like gold,” he said. And it was gold. The storm that had impoverished him made him rich. So it is oftentimes in life.

(excerpt from Streams in the Desert)