burn

i am fascinated with this picture. i love looking at the flame dancing around (it looks so realistic!).. and the thought that it could be held in one's open palms :)

anyway, i love fire. mahilig talaga ako sa apoy. haha. which is weird 'coz i'm rainlover yet at the same time, fire fascinates me a lot.

all of a sudden, i am remembering those weird moments when i and a couple of aliens would watch fixatedly on the dancing flames on top of my table. (er.. that's actually how i managed to use up all the alcohol i had..)

somehow, though, thinking about that makes me feel just a tad bit sad. *sigh* i am not in the mood to be emo or anything right now.. but the supposedly happy memory isn't exactly making me happy right now.. :(

* * *

this morning, somebody kept texting me. he wouldn't tell me his real name.. he would only give clues. it irritated me to no end. i suppose anyone would be annoyed at getting a "stalker-ish" texter.. but i am feeling even more irritated because he does seem to know me. and i don't even know who the darned guy is. grr.

and now i find myself wishing i had the power to throw fireballs at will. i'd probably do so.. if only i knew who he was..

* * *

this evening, i was in the kitchen as dad was deep-frying some pork. and as is usually the case, ako ang tinilamsikan ng mainit na langis. grr. it always happens. always.

i always get burned. but i don't seem to ever learn anything from it.

maybe i love fire too much for my own good..

* * *

it is now 11.15pm as i am typing this. and i'm not the least bit sleepy. *sigh*

instead, i am hoping and waiting for something.. but i guess it would not happen. not tonight, at least.. :( waiting in vain yet again..

i wish i could stop this burning inside. it's definitely not healthy.. not healthy at all..