it's always me

this is a picture of the rose i was supposed to take home from last weekend's prom. too bad i didn't even get this as a souvenir - somebody got it from our table, not knowing it was mine. tsk tsk.

sunday. i was sorting through some dresses at the mall and found one that i really, really liked. i was going to buy it already.. when i discovered that the strap was defective. and that was the last one in stock *sigh*

to sort of cheer me up a bit, i ate lunch with a friend of mine afterwards. but then, the pasta i wanted to order wasn't available. they didn't have the tea flavor i was asking for, either. great. so i settled for lasagna (which thankfully, tasted wonderful) instead. then, as we were about to pay, i realized i left my wallet in the car. hahaha. good thing i had just about enough cash to pay for lunch before leaving.

then yesterday, i had a sudden craving for (a certain brand of) burger. so i decided to call for delivery. i was already hungry then.. but i said, what the heck.. i can wait.. as long as i'd be eating what i really wanted. after 3/4 of an hour of waiting, i was so glad i could finally eat. until i opened the styro.. only to discover that the crew messed up! i ordered 2 big classic burgers with no onions and no cheese. what they delivered to me were two styros - one containing a bun with veggies (including onions & cheese); the other containing 3 burger patties. hahaha. that really sucked. i was so fed up with always being the unfortunate one.. so i called their hotline to complain. they apologized (as well, they should!) and sent me my order after another half hour of waiting. grrr. seems to me they should have just given me a refund for their lousy service. sheesh.

i wonder why things like this always happen to me.. :(

anyway. all this is just the tip of the iceberg. it's not just these little inconveniences that irk me. rather, it's how i usually seem to be the one who's taken for granted.. set aside.. ignored. hahaha. i'm not being "mopey" or "emo" - just stating a fact. if you place me in a crowded room and asked everybody to pair up, i'd most likely end up alone.. or the last one chosen, haha. it took some time for me to get used to this fact; but now i'm kinda ok with it and simply take it in stride. i don't know if i'm ever going to switch back to drama mode again (gaaah!! i certainly hope not!!).. but i really would like to exorcise all the emo-ish stuff in me, once and for all, bwahahaha.

and i guess it helps to answer the difficult "why" questions - mostly, the ones that are about my irrational behavior and stupid choices.. hahaha.

B(-/\r ____________.

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