no, maybe i'm not ready to actually pray this. not *yet* anyway. but i'm keeping it here.. so that when i'm ready.. i'll know what to say..
* * *
To the one I'm praying for:
Thank you for showing me, a jaded romantic fresh out of a relationship gone awfully sour, that I don't have to be bitter about love, and I don't have to close my heart off to emotions that have hurt me before.
I see in you all the traits and characteristics I have been asking God for in a boyfriend and potential spouse: the intelligence, the talent, the maturity, the Godliness, the sweetness, the passion and even a little bit of the looks. Hehe.
You have shown me that there could be someone better for me than the ones I only settled for, and that there are men like you who really know to treat a girl with gentleness, respect and affection. I wish I had found you sooner and spared myself the pain of being with Mr. Wrong, but I also know that seeing his "wrongness" makes you seem all the more right.
You have kept me from barricading my heart off and withdrawing into a world of "I don't want love" philosophies.
Best of all, you've started me off again hoping, daydreaming, writing poetry, humming love songs and thinking happy thoughts about someone all day long, something I haven't done in awhile.
At this point, it does not yet matter whether or not God will give you to me. I thank Him already that you have cushioned the blow of a broken relationship. So whatever His will may be for us, I'm just glad and grateful that I know you, and hopefully we can become better friends so that I can get to know you better.
It may not even be God's will for you to find out how I feel about you, but nonetheless, I write this with a prayer that somehow, someday, you'll know...
Love always,
pauline
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